If I was presented with every sandwich I've ever eaten - compiled in one space in their original, uneaten form - I would find a samurai sword and cut my own head off. I suspect I've probably consumed in the neighborhood of 400 million sandwiches which, according to my math, equals SO MANY sandwiches a day. I can't resist them. Look at that artfully draped ham. I made that meat sculpture. And then like Saturn does in Goya's horrific snacktime masterpiece, I devoured my helpless, little ham child.